I am taking a quick second to let everyone know whats been going on…
Last week we started the new term. My final term, I will add. I was welcomed to my new nursing class with open arms. I am the quiet person in class at this point. They will find out soon… :-). We have hit the ground running with Lectures, paperwork, lab and tomorrow we have our clinical site orientation. I am excited to say that I will be starting on the critical care unit for the first 3 weeks then I will go to the tele floor for the remainder of the time. I will be happy to get through critical care, for me, it causes more of an emotional response. I know that I will be just fine. I am oddly calm about this term. I feel deep inside my soul that I am going to be just fine. I say this prior to my first exam mind you…but still, I say it. I know that I will be OK.
Every day, every night I keep myself going. Some days I feel that I am simply going through the motions. Some days I simply am ‘sleep walking’ through my day. I keep going. I know that my little family depends on my success. I will not let them down. December graduate here I come..
Who are you?
What a funny question to ask. If I was to ask you ‘Who are you?’ what would your response be? While you think about that for a second or ten. I will first ask myself that same question: ‘Who are you, Cheryle?’
I am first and always my own person. I am a daughter, sister, wife, and best friend. I am a nurse in the making. I am the protector of those whom I love. I am the one who will give you the last 3 dollars in my pocket. I am the one who will stand up for myself but rarely do because when I do, it causes problems. I am the one to push myself harder than any other. I am the one who has to work harder for what I have. I am the one who feels that if I am right about something or feel passionate about something then I will not back down. I am also the one who will tell on myself, and be the first to apologize when I am wrong. I am the one who will often take one for the team, but make sure that the whole team learns the same lesson. I wear my heart on my sleeve, and my suit of armor under my clothes. I believe in the magic of the fairies, the teaching of buddha and have a relationship with God. I am a loyal friend till the end, and yet not the one you want to cross off your list. I am an open book, and will tell you anything that you ask, but you have to ask the right question.
I am wise beyond my 39 years and have been through more in the past 10 years than most people my age. I have seen what drugs and alcohol can do to a person. I have lost too many friends to the demons that live within. I am a confidant, counselor, the positive light to shine in the darkness so a few could find their way. I am the friend that never forgets how special our bond is. I am the friend who holds on to the memories, so that even if your forget I will be able to remind you.
I am the nurse to tend to his wounds, the hand to hold when he needed me the most. I am the one at the other end of the phone when it just is too much to take. I am the voice in his ear when he can not speak. I am the vision in his sleep when he can not see. I am the heart that loves him the most.
I am so much to so many people. I am the one to put myself last. I am the one to put my needs on hold to make sure others are cared for. I am the first to recognize my own demons and know how to keep them away. I am the one who is willing to walk away if it saves another heartache for another person. I keep all the secrets. I hold the keys to the locked drawers of my heart. I am the one to cry in the shower when I am lonely. I am the one to dance in the living room when no one is home. I am the one who will do what I can to make someone else laugh. I am the class clown, the fixer of the electronics, the holder of random trivia.
I could go on..my point is this. Before you judge me, before you make assumptions about me…you really should get to know me.
Now, who are you?